We’ve all heard the claim that almost half of all marriages in the U.S. end in divorce. But did you know that statistic is even higher for subsequent marriages? In fact, 67% of second marriages and 74% of third marriages end in divorce. That doesn’t exactly make you want to run to the altar.
If you are contemplating remarriage, don’t allow these figures to dissuade you from popping the question. When analyzing second and third marriages that end in divorce, there are a few common issues that keep appearing; they come up all the time when our New Jersey divorce lawyers are speaking with a client about his reasons for ending his marriage. If you’re aware of these potential issues and can avoid them, your marriage is more likely to succeed.
Here are five reasons why second and third marriages are prone to divorce.
The “Been There, Done That” Mentality
Many couples stay together because they’re not sure how a divorce will shake out for them. If you’ve been through one divorce and have come out of it relatively unscathed, you may be less fearful of a second divorce. And if you have a trusted New Jersey divorce attorney, you may feel more supported in your decision to divorce a second or third time. Also, prenuptial agreements are more common in second marriages, so your finances post-divorce may not be as much of a concern this time around.
Lasting Emotional Concerns from A Previous Marriage
If your ex-spouse was emotionally abusive or narcisstic, you may still be recovering emotionally from her outbursts. When you see those behaviors start to emerge in your current spouse, you’re more likely to put your foot down and walk out the door. The same goes for infidelity. If your ex cheated on you during your marriage, you may be more suspicious of your current spouse. Whether she’s actually unfaithful or not, you may not be able to move past your feelings of doubt.
Marrying for the Wrong Reasons
Some people rush into a second marriage before they’ve really healed from their first. Divorce attorneys for men in New Jersey see this happen all the time. A divorce can be lonely, and it’s common to date before your divorce is even finalized. If you started seeing your current spouse before you were legally divorced, you may not have had the time to reflect on the relationship and define what you want to do differently this time around. You may even feel like you didn’t really know your spouse’s true nature before you got remarried.
Not Having to “Stay Together for the Kids”
Many second and third marriages do not involve shared children. Since many people believe children are the glue that holds a family together, it follows that a second marriage with no children is more likely to end in divorce. That’s not to say that childless spouses are always more likely to divorce. It just means that a couple that isn’t co-parenting their shared children may not feel pressure to stay together to keep their family intact.
Additionally, the strain of becoming a step-parent to your spouse’s children from a previous marriage can cause issues within your marriage. Living with someone else’s children can be trying. Kids are often resentful of their step-parents and may go out of their way to make things more difficult. Your ex’s ongoing custody battle may be the straw that breaks the camel’s back.
Finances are already one of the top causes of divorce, so when you consider that spouses in second marriages are usually more financially established it makes sense that issues could surface over time. Differences of opinion can arise when it comes to budgeting, saving vs. spending, whether to open joint accounts, and more.
If a couple has been able to acquire significant assets together in their marriage, it often poses problems for the division of property in the divorce. Some divorcing couples in their second or third marriage just can’t agree to a fair division of their marital assets. When no amount of negotiation will help, divorce lawyers for men in New Jersey end up addressing these issues in court.
Divorce for Second and Third Marriages in New Jersey
Have you already been experiencing the aforementioned issues in your marriage? You’re not alone. At The Micklin Law Group, our New Jersey divorce attorneys for men and fathers have seen these issues arise in second marriages time and time again.
We assist men with the complicated divorce and family law issues common in second and third marriages. If you’ve reached your breaking point and are ready for a divorce, get in touch with our attorneys by calling our Nutley office at 973-562-0100 or our Montclair office at 862-245-4620.