When I was in law school and the idea of practicing family law began to appeal to me, I met with a number of divorce lawyers to learn more about what the profession was like.
As I met with attorneys who had great reputations, they would tell me something about their practice and often throw in “but I don’t tell that to clients.” I heard some form of the line repeatedly in the meetings and then after I graduated from other lawyers in the field.
“But I don’t tell this to my clients.”
The attitude mystified me because my feeling has been that to serve the people we help, we need to be open and honest with them. As I built my own practice focusing on men and fathers getting a divorce in New Jersey, I’ve always tried to be as up-front as possible. It is a trait I instill in the younger attorneys who work with me.
So, if you are thinking of getting a divorce in New Jersey and are trying to decide who to represent you, here are five things you’re not likely to hear from other family law firms.
Divorce lawyers know little about financial matters
In many divorces, issues involving taxes, valuing assets and calculating the future worth of 401(k) and other investments play an important role in negotiating the property settlement and setting support payments. I’m not a financial expert but I know people who are. So, we often bring in tax specialists, business evaluators and even forensic accounts to work with our clients.
Be prepared for an emotional rollercoaster
Divorce is tough on everyone: The husband and father, the wife, and their kids. Few men and fathers in New Jersey are prepared for the emotional toll a divorce is likely to take on them. Many family law firms don’t see their role as helping a client deal with this. We’re different because we sponsor a support group for men and fathers getting divorced– and you don’t have to be a client to participate.
We’ll drag out your divorce as long as possible
Yes, attorneys are paid for our time as well as our expertise in a specialized field. Some see slow-walking a matter as a way to boost their income. Some lawyers even try adding fuel to the fire by keeping you fighting for things they know you aren’t going to get in the settlement. But really good lawyers are busy and especially when dealing with a divorce, we want to help our clients move on with their lives as quickly as possible. Not doing so is putting our interests ahead of our clients and we won’t tolerate that from any of our family law lawyers.
Our invoices are designed to confuse you
There are numerous charges that are part of a divorce from court filing fees to faxes sent to your wife’s attorney. I’ve seen invoices from some family law firms that are more complicated than any of Einstein’s theories. We work hard to ensure that our invoices are clear and easy to read, and we’ll always have time to explain anything you might not completely understand.
An aggressive attorney will cost you more
There is a difference between being tough and being aggressive. Some family lawyers pride themselves on aggressively fighting over every last point of disagreement even when they know their client isn’t going to prevail. Our approach is to work with out clients to develop a strategy that will get them the important things they want but not simply run up the bill arguing with your ex’s lawyer for things you don’t care about and are willing to concede.
If you are a man or father in New Jersey who is considering a divorce and want the straight scoop on what will be involved, what it’s likely to cost you, and what to expect as the divorce process unfolds, feel free to call me or one of our experienced family law attorneys for men and fathers in New Jersey. Reach us at either 973.562.0100 in Nutley or, in Montclair, at 862.245.4620. We are here to help you.
