Maybe things haven’t been going well with your spouse for a while, or she just dropped a bombshell that’s left you heartbroken and rattled. You’re considering your options moving forward, and “the D word” has crossed your mind once or twice. Divorce is a big decision, so how can you be sure it’s right for you? Ask yourself these important questions before you decide to pull the plug.
Is there anything else I can (or want) to do to salvage my marriage?
Many people say that when it’s time to go, you’ll know. But if you’re questioning whether you’ve done enough, it may benefit you to speak to a trusted family member or friend about the struggles you’re having. They may have some advice about the way you can approach these issues with your spouse. Having a conversation with loved ones about your marriage may also highlight why it’s definitely time for you to move on! I highly recommend being honest with your loved ones because their support can be invaluable during the divorce.
Will ending the marriage actually solve my frustrations?
Communication is a necessary component of any relationship, whether you’re married or not. If there is one big issue weighing heavily on you in your marriage, consider whether you’ve adequately communicated your frustrations to your partner. Maybe you’re both the victims of a devastating miscommunication, and there’s a chance you can turn things around.
Sometimes therapy is a better option than divorce, especially if you have children. You will be forced to be in your ex’s life as a co-parent for years to come. If your issues will persist even after a divorce, why not try to “fix” them while you’re still married? If you and your spouse are both willing to put in the effort, you may be surprised at what happens.
Am I prepared for a divorce?
I know attempting to reconcile isn’t an option for every couple, and many men who are considering divorce are already at the end of their rope. But just because you know you’re done with the marriage, that doesn’t mean it’s the right time to actually file for divorce. There’s no law that requires you to tell your spouse you’re leaving before you’re ready, so you can take your time coming to terms with the end of the relationship if that’s what you need. In addition to the emotional work they may need to do prior to their divorce, I often suggest that men work with a divorce consultant to learn more about what their divorce may look like even before it begins.
How can I make my kids a priority during a divorce?
Dads who are getting a divorce in New Jersey often worry about how their relationship with their kids will change. Our family law attorneys for dads have seen enough divorces to know that your role as a parent doesn’t have to change just because you’re not married anymore. Since your relationship with your child is unique, no one can tell you exactly how you should address the divorce with your child. However, studies have shown that children crave stability during their parents’ divorce. The best way to provide this stability is to keep showing up. Continue attending your child’s sports games, scout meetings, and school performances, and commit to continuing any parent-child rituals you shared during your marriage.
Ready for A Divorce?
If you’ve thought through your options and have decided divorce is the best option, contact The Micklin Law Group’s attorneys for men and dads. We are here to help you navigate this challenging time while protecting your rights and ensuring you walk away from your marriage with dignity and stability. Reach out today.
