Finding Happiness After Divorce

Resources for Men and Fathers

It’s common to feel both relief and sadness after your divorce is finalized. Even if it was for the best, you may still feel the need to mourn the end of your marriage. While it’s perfectly normal to need that time to recover from your divorce, you also deserve to find search -moments of happiness in your day as you go through this period of intense emotions. You might not feel prepared to put yourself back out there yet, but eventually you’ll be ready to jump back into doing the things you loved pre-divorce.

If you’ve been putting career advancement, social engagements, and dating on hold, why not consider slowly reintroducing yourself to some of these passions and hobbies? Whether it’s been days, months, or years since your divorce was finalized, now is a great time to start the habits and activities that will help you find happiness again. We’ve compiled this list of resources to act as a jumping-off point as you begin your journey down this new life path toward contentment.

All About Happiness

What is true happiness, and how can we achieve it? These resources attempt to answer this difficult question.

Destigmatizing Therapy and Counseling

Men often feel as if they can’t express their true emotions during divorce because they are afraid of being seen as “weak.” This TED talk focuses on the lessons we’ve been taught as men and why it may be in our best interest to undo some of them.

 Why I’m Done Trying to Be ‘Man Enough’ by Justin Baldoni for TED- YouTube

If you feel that no one in your life understands what you’re going through, consider attending a meeting of Brad Micklin’s Divorce and Custody Support Group. This is a confidential place for divorcing and divorced men and fathers to discuss their legal concerns as well as the complicated thoughts and emotions they may be experiencing. You may even be able to meet new friends who are going through the same thing.

Divorce and Custody Support Group

presented by The Micklin Law Group

Attend

Additional Mental Health and Therapy Resources

• Removing the Stigma from Men’s Mental Health at the National Library of Medicine
• How to Prepare for Your First Therapy Session by Choosing Therapy
• 5 Myths that Prevent Men from Fighting Depression at the National Alliance on Mental Illness
• search – Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) National Helpline

Adjusting Your Outlook- Creating Goals and Setting Expectations

Did you know visualization is a research-backed method for imagining and achieving your goals? Visualizing your goals and future happiness can make you more confident, and it may also make it more likely for you to achieve these goals.

• 5 Steps to Setting Powerful Intentions by Deepak Chopra
• Setting Goals Isn’t Enough: Setting Daily Intentions Will Change Your Life by Inc.
• Hack Your Brain for Better Problem Solving at Big Think
• Build Mental Models to Enhance Your Focus at Big Think – YouTube

Healthy Co-Parenting

Divorced dads often struggle with co-parenting. Many have difficulty moving on when they’re forced to see their ex during custody exchanges and at their children’s events. Others simply wish their high-conflict co-parenting relationship could be easier for their own happiness and sanity. These resources can help you build a healthier relationship with your co-parent, which should make everyone happier – including your kids.

• Christmas After Divorce: How to Make Christmas a Happy Occasion by The Micklin Law Group
• Five Ways You Can Stay Close to Your Children After Divorce by The Micklin Law Group
• Co-Parenting after Divorce articles by Divorce Mag
• You Are More Than What You Feel published by Divorce Mag

Creating Boundaries with A Narcissist Co-Parent

We know it’s not possible for every dad to have a peaceful relationship with his co-parent. Some high-conflict situations, like parenting your children with a narcissist, require a unique approach if you hope to maintain your happiness and your sanity. The following links are great resources for dealing with a high-conflict ex while keeping your relationship with your kids intact.

• Co-Parenting With A Narcissist by The Micklin Law Group
• Parallel Parenting: A High Conflict Co-Parenting Model by The Micklin Law Group
• 6 Tips for Co-Parenting When Your Ex Is Toxic by The Micklin Law Group
• How to Identify a Narcissist + Cope with Their Potentially Toxic Behavior at NBC News
• Co-Parenting With a Narcissist: The Impossible Dream at Psychology Today

Physical and Mental Wellness After Divorce

Research shows a correlation between physical health, mental wellbeing, and longevity. Don’t underestimate the importance of your mental health. Positive mental health practices can decrease stress and symptoms of depression that could otherwise negatively affect your physical health.

• The Psyche Diet: How Mental Wellness Supports Lifelong Physical Health at Big Think
• Your Reptilian Brain, Explained at Big Think
• Feel and Believe What You’re Saying Is True With These Affirmations published by Deepak Chopra
• Using Meditation and Mindfulness to Deal With the Aftermath of Divorce at The Daily Mind

Physical exercise can also produce endorphins and increase your physical functioning, leaving you feeling less sluggish and tired and more invigorated.

• How Does Exercise Affect the Brain? By the Dana Foundation
• Exercise and the Brain at The Conversation
• Get Happy: Why Exercise Can Lift Your Mood from the Cleveland Clinic
• 7 Ways Exercise Makes You Happy from Insider Health